The Final Recap of the Year - 2023

Looking back and looking forward

The other day, Steve Anthony shared a touching post on his Instagram about his crippling self-doubt and a creative drought he had experienced a few years ago and how reflecting on his past achievements helped to regain his voice. Self-doubt, like depression, doesn’t discriminate. It doesn’t matter if you are an aspiring author/illustrator, or someone successful like Steve Anthony who will be celebrating his 10th year as an author-illustrator and his 23rd book next year, or someone in between like me. It creeps up on you whoever you are.

This year I had only one book published. I know it should be good enough but I kept comparing myself to the past me who published five books in 2021. And I had a challenging time with some projects this year and I started doubting my ability as an author and illustrator. And self-doubt has a friend - a green monster called envy. It’s inspiring to have so many talented friends around you, but it could be tricky sometimes when self-doubt is hovering over your head. For example, five friends of mine were nominated for the next year’s prestigious Yoto Carnegie Awards. They totally deserve it and I’m happy for them, but I couldn’t help feeling a pang of jealousy. In times like that, it’s hard to ignore your inner voice telling you aren’t good enough, isn’t it? So, it’s important to remind yourself how far you’ve come now and then. But what does “achievement” really mean? Let me contemplate on that while looking back on what I have done this year.

In February, The Blue Umbrella written by Emily Ann Davison and illustrated by me was published by Andersen Press. The best thing that came out of this project was friendship with Emily. It’s not unusual that you (illustrator) never get to meet or speak to the author of your book at all. Some authors seem to just move on once they put down the pen. Emily, on the other hand, cared our book (and I appreciate that she always calls it “our book”) and made a lot of efforts in promoting it. She was keen to get me involved so we got talking and getting know each other. Unfortunately, I haven’t had the pleasure of meeting her in person yet, but The Blue Umbrella paperback edition will be out in February next year so we’re hoping to finally meet then.

Making of The Blue Umbrella

In March, I went to the Bologna Children’s Book Fair for the first time since the pandemic. One of the highlight was seeing the blad (a sample copy) of my next authored book, Pearl and Her Bunch at Hachette Children’s stand. The book will be published in May next year. It’ll have been three years since my last authored book was published, so I can’t wait to see my new book baby going out in the world. I’m already thinking about how to celebrate it 🎉

But I owe all the fun I had in Bologna to wonderful Erika Meza*. My original accommodation plan fell through but she let me crash her hotel room. Then, she introduced me to a wonderful gang of her author/illustrator friends who were also visiting the fair.

*Erika is an amazing human being but also a super talented children’s book author-illustrator. It’s annoying really…😂

Also in March, The Pet Potato paperback edition came out. Josh Lacey’s story is brilliant and funny so it’s no surprise that the book has been received very well around the world, particularly in US (they must really love potatoes). Also, the book was nominated for Inclusive Books for Children Awards 2024.

But my personal favourite is the Japanese edition that came out this summer. I felt so proud to hear my mum had spotted the book in her local bookshop. Also, my Japanese friend’s cousins happened to run a bookshop in Osaka and they made a special display for the book 🙏

One of sad news of the year was the independent children’s bookshop, Tales on Moon Lane’s retreat from Herne Hill in South London. But this year I had opportunities to paint some bookshop windows in London and it allowed me to build relationships with the bookshops. Particularly I’m glad to have discovered new local children’s book shop, ChocoLit, in Clapham Common. The owner is a lovely lady who is keen to support authors and illustrators.

In July, I shared a table with my friends (life drawing & urban sketch enthusiast Rachel Bone and Chine-collé print artist Sangeeta Bhagawati) at the Illustrators’ Fair. I have been participating in the fair every summer since 2017 (except 2019 and 2020). The joy of meeting customers (especially little readers), fellow artists and people from publishers never gets old.

Over the summer, my social circle grew, thanks to those who I had met in Bologna. At my publisher’s annual summer party last year, I didn’t know anyone except my editor and art director. Fast forward 12 months, I found myself at the same party but I found many familiar and friendly faces this time. What a difference a year could make!

The Illustrators’ Fair

Another highlight of the year came in my favourite month, October. I was invited to the British School of Brussels Book Festival. Since I have a day job, I can’t do as many school visits as I would like, but, when I get to do one, I love it! I had such a fantastic time. Seeing young students enjoying my books first-hand was the most gratifying because first and foremost I make books for them. Then, hearing my book and/or I somehow managed to have inspired some of them was more than I could hope for.

Lastly, I finished three books this year. One of them is Pearl and Her Bunch I mentioned earlier. Because this year’s Bologna fair happened earlier than usual, my art director, Paula, and I frantically worked on the cover against the clock in the new year and we got it done two weeks before the fair. I have no idea how Paula managed to get the blad done in time. I’ll share more about this book closer to the publication.

from Pearl and Her Bunch

I can’t talk about the other two books yet, but do you remember I mentioned in the last newsletter that, despite of some advise, I didn’t include “children’s book staples” such as dinosaurs in my portfolio? I didn’t like drawing dinosaurs, pirates and monsters/aliens because I believed I wasn’t good at it. But, you know what? I drew ALL of them in one of the new books! I think I just needed a bit of courage to get out of my comfort zone. Did I mention the book also include horses? I must have been a bit mad when I accept this project 😂

With the other book, I also put myself out of my comfort zone. (Jeez… I should give myself a break!) I don’t like drawing backgrounds, especially sceneries. But I draw a lot of them, even including night time ones in this book. If you subscribe Helen Stephens Substack, you might have read her interesting Q&A post on “Capturing Light and Dark”. Unless you’re a Dutch master, capturing light is not an easy thing to do. This project was challenging for many reasons but, looking back, I’m glad I did.

A sneak peek.

If I measure my achievements by the number of books I published or awards I was nominated, this year feels like a step back. Instead, if I use different measurements, like “personal growth” or “number of human connections I made”, I feel my year was a big step forward. But of course I couldn’t achieve all these by myself. First of all, I’d like to thank all my friends old and new for having enriched my year with their company. Thanks also to my editors, art directors and everyone who work on my books for their hard work and patience. I know it’s not easy to work with someone quietly stubborn like me. And big thank you to book sellers, librarians and of course little readers and their parents and caregivers for supporting my books and spreading the joy of reading!

There were so many sad and upsetting news in the world this year and some are still ongoing. I sincerely hope the next year will bring more peace to our planet. And I wish you a wonderful festive season filled with hope, joy and laughter (and some books)!

See you in 2024!

Momo x

Any comments and question will be welcome!

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